Christian Bale Cast as This Tech Legend and He Didn’t Even Have to Audition For It

Oh god, I hope Christian Bale doesn’t bring any weird voices to the Steve Jobs biopic. So, Christian, while I understand the temptation to make Jobs sound like Screech from “Saved By the Bell,” please don’t … just don’t.

According to Aaron Sorkin, the screenwriter for the upcoming Steve Jobs movie, Bale, the British actor responsible for the horrible/great Bat-voice in the Nolan Batman trilogy, didn’t have to audition for the role of the highly mythicized Apple founder.

Sorkin told Bloomberg Television, “We needed the best actor on the board in a certain age range and that’s Chris Bale. He didn’t have to audition. Well, there was a meeting.”

While it seems like one of those it-has-to-be-brilliant-because-it’s-so-decisive leaps of faith, the choice to cast Bale isn’t nearly as uninformed by nothing but potential as it may seem. After all, remember Christian Bale at his very finest? Even at less than four minutes total, his infamous rant on the “Terminator: Salvation” set obviously qualifies him to play the role of the hot-headed Jobs.

If Bale can bring an ounce of that self-entitled, righteous anger to the Jobs biopic, which is being helmed by “Slumdog Millionaire” director Danny Boyle, the movie should be a slam dunk. Just imagine Bale screaming hysterically at Steve Wozniak, who I would have played by a fat, goofy Jonah Hill, about what shade of cream the Macintosh 128K should be — magical. Add in the legendary Sorkin, who also screen wrote “The Social Network,” another movie about a prescient, complicated jerk that revolutionized the tech world, and you can pretty much bet your life savings that it will at least be 10 times the film that “Jobs” was — hell, just subtracting Ashton Kutcher out of any equation always equals a net positive.